Climate control

To the married women out there: do you ever wonder if you and your husband would be matched on those dating websites? I mean, don't sites like E-harmony and make each person fill out ridiculously long questionnaires to help identify key traits, similar tastes, and common goals? I met my husband in college but sometimes I catch myself wondering if the internet fates would have aligned us together unknowingly, should we have needed to go that route. Do our personalities fit together on paper as nicely as they do in real life?

There are so many ways that we are literally the same person, but just different genders. We're both first-borns, both leaders, and we're fairly outspoken ; we are active, competitive, and incredibly stubborn; we both feel satisfied helping others, thus the exact same career choice in health care; we're both sarcastic brats who put on a tough front while being tender-hearted on the inside; you get my point, I'm sure. But this post is about one big fatty difference we have. I wonder if the dating websites have a question that reads, "Would you rather die by heat or by cold?" because if they do, we'd never match up as potential soul mates.

Nate was born in Wisconsin which boasts extremely cold winters. I was born in Missouri which boats extremely hot and humid summers. We are both products of our environment, without a doubt, and for some reason this is just now hitting me after 2 years of marriage and 7 years together. It was obvious way back when, just by looking at our youngers selves in college.

Picture this: it's a cold and snowy day as college students walk to and from their classes, all bundled up in coats and gloves. Then you see this one girl literally running across the quad with her gigantic winter jacket pulled securely around every inch of exposed skin, hood and all. She does not stop to say hello to her friends, for she has her eyes on the prize---getting into the next building to shelter her from the cold. She becomes a mega-biyatch when the temperatures dip below freezing so you might as well let her run from class to class just to avoid her wrath.

Then there is this adorable Wisconsin transplant who decided to attend college in St. Louis. Neither he nor his northern parents had a clue what STL summers would be like, but they found out quickly as they moved their beloved son into the dorms in August (the hottest and humidest month eva). Said WI boy calls his mother after 3 days in a non-air conditioned dorm room and begs her to ship a window AC unit to him. He might die without it. He really might. He has now decided that Missouri summers are his own personal hell and he honestly does not know if he can survive four years in this heat. (Of course, it's all worth it in the end when he meets that crazy biyatch who sprints around to avoid the cold. He's glad he stuck it out in St. Louis, don't worry.)

Fast forward to present day: that guy and that girl got married, and because the dude endured Missouri summers for 7 years the chick decided to suck it up and take on Wisconsin winters for a few. It's only fair, right?

I sometimes forget that Nate's fragile northern body cannot handle temperatures above 75 degrees without being FORCED to complain about his discomfort. Case in point? Tonight's dinner time interaction that left me rolling on the ground in laughter while contemplating our differences in this marriage.

Nate: I have a bead that is about to drip.

Julia: No clue what you are talking about.

N: I'm sweating. It's so effing hot in here. I can't take it anymore.

J: (Note to self: the high for today was literally 74 degrees. It was approximately 68 degrees at the time of this incident.)

N: I mean, I take a hot shower, then stick my head in the oven, and proceed to eat steaming hot food. What part of that is going to cool me off?

J: Wait, why did you stick your head in the oven??

N: Because I had to pull out the stupid food! It made me even hotter!

J: You have got to be kidding me.

N: And why aren't any of our windows open right now? This is just ridiculous.

I then proceeded to laugh for about 5 minutes straight while staring at this irritated face:

Yes, I received death glares as I snapped away to commemorate this moment.


It really just makes me laugh harder, you guys. He's so cute when he's hot and angry:)

I think it just drives home the fact that despite our similarities, my husband and I will never see eye-to-eye on the 'perfect' climate. I'd take lying on a beach somewhere, drink in hand, while sweating my face off in 95 degree heat any day. He'd prefer to be downhill skiing in 0 degrees just because of all the fun outdoorsy gear he could wear for such an occasion. It's a lesson of compromise my friends: we both get to complain when the weather gets a little too extreme for our liking. That's normal, right?

Do other couples have this same climate control issue? How do you settle on a happy medium to avoid one of you moving to the Equator and the other to Antarctica? Yes, we are a marriage of extremes. And it makes me laugh at him when it's hot and cry for me when it's cold.


  1. Yep, we have the same problem. (even though we both grew up in St. Louis)

    Love the pics of "angry" Nate!

  2. Our argument?
    R: "Just put a blanket on!"

    Me: "Just take some clothes off!" :)

    Ahhh... the neverending arguments on setting the temperature in the house.

    Tee-hee, I'm loving this St. Louis heat! ;)

  3. Yep exact same argument. I love nothing more than 90 degree evenings with high humidity. Anything over 75 and Chad is whining. Our solution is little to no heat on in the winters and windows open most of the summer. Saves us a ton of money. LOL

  4. Yep - same arguments over here. We live in Houston and the summers are absolutely miserable (at least to the husband!) I don't mind it so much but he would much rather move somewhere up North.


  5. We have similar ideas about climate...we are both sick of the cold (especially after this past New England winter), but are going to stick it out since the summers here make it bearable...but he LOVES the heat, and I can take it, but I'm definitely not in love with it like he is.

    Case in point, our wedding was on a 90+ degree humid southern summer day (heat wave all up and down the east coast) and he couldn't get enough of it. I couldn't stop sweating.

  6. We do not have this issue, but we have an issue with blankets in the bed. (The man refuses to sleep under a sheet, so I'm under the sheet and he's on top of it - he's so weird.)

    This post amused me greatly. :)

  7. we are pretty same when it comes to hating winter in our little fam. I'll take 100 degrees before 5 degrees any day.

  8. We totally have the same argument! He's ALWAYS hot. Always! I'm always cold. He works outside all day so heaven forbid our house is anywhere above 73 degrees in the summer. I work in an office that's so cold I have a space heater. In the middle of summer. In Texas. Where it's been over 100 degree for several days in the past two weeks. This absolutely blows my husband's mind.

  9. Though I grew up in frigid WI, we have the same problem over here. Hubby calls me the air conditioning nazi because I am always turning it off, and he is sprawled on the couch sweating.

  10. Charlie and I always wonder if we'd get matched on one of those dating sites. I seriously doubt it. The climate is a constant source of debate for us. He wants to know why I wear 6 layers of clothes in the winter. I can't understand why he would ever want to turn on the AC in the summer. :)

  11. oh my gosh this is me and my husband EXACTLY...except that i grew up in WI/IL and he grew up in STL....he freaks out and acts like he's going to die once it hits 75 degrees. i, on the other hand, am not warm unless it's at least 80-85 degrees. yesterday i got home from work, ac was set to 78, i switched to 80 (it's expensive! and i love heat :)) and listened to him whine. sigh. we're not even 1 year into marriage, we'll be fighting this fight for many years to come!

  12. My husband sweats just thinking about the sun. He spent ages 5-13 in South Dakota before moving to Northern California where the summer time high would be 100 degrees and the winter low would be about 45, if even that. He was used to sub zero temperatures so he doesn't mind the cold as much. But the heat? OMG. He had to have his brother, his best man, hold a towel on our wedding day so he could wipe sweat away. And it was only 83 degrees and he was standing in the shade.
    He is always turning the a/c up in our apartment to the point where I wear sweats, sweatshirts and blankets while watching tv. It is freezing. His whole family is like this.

  13. My husband and I don't have this extreme difference in the perfect climate, although he gets annoyed because he thinks I have a one degree range of when I am not too hot or too cold. It drives him crazy because I adjust the air or heat a lot until I have it just right and it can't be off even just a smidge without me complaining.

  14. We're starting to find a happy medium - I like it colder inside and he likes it warmer. So we set it at 75 during the day and 71 at night (and he gets extra blankets).

    By the way - the hubs and I signed up for a free e-harmony weekend because we wanted to know if we'd be matched. And we weren't. Together 8 years and married for 2 and apparently we "aren't compatible". We are still laughing about that one!

  15. I love the convo! :) I think Nate's a bit of a baby too. And I'm starting to wonder what kind of summer's you guys have because Minnesota does get very hot and humid!

  16. amen! Glad to hear it's not just like that in my house. :)

  17. love that we are not the only ones with this issue!

    and leah~yes, WI and I'm sure Minn get a little warm and 'humid' during the summer months. But I can promise you it is NOTHING like an STL summer. Those are just out of control, trust me:)

  18. This is hilarious because it's totally something Matt has said before. "I just stuck my head in a hot oven. GOSH!" Too funny.

  19. Hmmm, I think I'm with Nate on this one even though I grew up in Missouri. Maybe it's just this week's forecast where the pick day is a high of 93 that is influencing me, but this weather is just miserable. I can't run outside unless it's super early, I can't take the dog to the park without fear of him dying, and I can't walk to school without getting sweaty. That being said, I don't mind the heat if I have a pool to jump into:)

    Ask me again in January and I might change my mind.


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