Speedy update

1. Keri called me today to specifically say the following: "Please tell everyone that the donations are NOT tax deductible. I thought they were but it was a misunderstanding. The fund is totally legit but you just can't claim donations to the IRS." 

She is so funny because she seriously stressed over this, thinking that people would accuse her of 'false advertising'. Love that girl.

But now you know the truth. Give to be kind, not to claim it on your taxes.

2. Also, as I'm sure you've read on her website by now, she said in her message, "I don't have the cancer gene!!!!!!!" Just like that, with multiple exclamations. It was so nice to hear not one but TWO good pieces of news in two days. Sigh of relief goes here----but of course, we'll never have a reason for this cancer. But I guess we can't dwell on the 'why me' stuff. 

3. We went out to dinner after work with fellow co-workers. SUPER fun but also it made me really really tired---we stayed until 9 pm! I can't cram in all of my computer time into one measly hour before bed! What was I thinking?! Kind of sad, isn't it? 

4. Thank you [times one hundred] for all of the support. The power of the internet is pretty ridiculous sometimes. Ridiculous in a good way, of course:)

5. Did I mention that we are driving to STL this weekend? I'm getting really freaking excited. Henry got his haircut today for the vacation. And I special ordered HOT weather for us northerners. It's going to be a blast:)

The official request

Okay, I finished my flyer. I've sent it out to every single person on my email list [which makes me nervous for some reason, don't ask me why]. I plan on printing a few hard copies and posting them at my hospital, and possibly handing them out to businesses, too. Next will come Facebook and Myspace. No such things as overkill, right? :)

Please email me if you would like a hard copy and I will give you one [jules5.27.07 at gmail]. I think that the more people who hear Keri's story and become aware of HOW they can help, the better results we'll get. I hope and pray donations will pay for her massive medical expenses.

Other bloggers---link to this post if you'd like. Or make your own. But let's all dig out our checkbooks and make a difference, shall we?

Here is what the flyer looks like:

Keri's story:

Sometimes life is so unfair. Keri is one of those people everyone loves to be around. Her charisma is undeniable and her positive attitude is contagious. Keri has always been a fighter, a leader, and a pillar of strength for those in her life.

She is a down-to-earth, true Mid-western girl who has called Kansas, Missouri, and Indiana home. As a Physical Therapist, she makes her living by caring for others, and now is the time for us to return the favor.

On March 14, 2008 Keri’s life changed forever. At the age of 26 she was diagnosed with Stage 3 breast cancer. On April 2, 2008 she underwent a bilateral mastectomy and began her fight with a disease that knows no limits.

Her bright future is clouded with the cold hard facts: 8 rounds of chemotherapy, 6 weeks of daily radiation, multiple reconstructive surgeries, hormonal replacement therapy, and infertility treatments. When you attack cancer with chemotherapy and other estrogen suppressing drugs before you’ve had children, your dream of becoming a mother is jeopardized. Keri’s doctors have said her treatments will most definitely stop ovulation for the rest of her life, throwing her young body into menopause. So Keri will freeze her eggs to give her hope of having a baby—a procedure that comes with a $10,000 price tag but not covered by insurance.

Helen Keller once said, “I am only one, but still I am one. I cannot do everything, but still I can do something.” If everyone who reads Keri’s story contributes to her fund the financial burden of cancer could be lifted from her shoulders. Any amount would be greatly appreciated and every dollar counts. Why not make a difference in someone’s life? And what better time than right now?

Please make your donation check to:

Keri Wilkie Breast Cancer Medical Fund
P.O. Box 833
Emporia, KS 66801

If you’d like to follow Keri’s online journal please go to:
http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/keri

Big Fat Update

Keri just called me!

She got her test results back:

• PET scan was negative.
• CT scan was inconclusive. There were two microscopic areas in her lung that might be metastases but her doctor is not going to treat her cancer any differently. He is still giving her the category of Stage 3 and will still treat the cancer in the same manner. After a few rounds of chemotherapy, they will re-scan the lung. If those areas shrink, they are mets. But again, he's still calling this Stage 3 for now.
  
• This means she can freeze her eggs!!!!
• So she starts her fertility drugs today. She is just BARELY hitting this window of opportunity with her cycle, time needed to harvest eggs, and pending chemo. This is a huge blessing, you guys. Thank you to the Big Guy upstairs.
  
• Her chemo has to begin much sooner than originally planned, because if she does have metastases, they have to be even more aggressive. She has to begin by April 28 instead of waiting five more weeks.
• That means she'll be going through chemo when Allison and I visit which is fine by me because we get to be caregivers! You know we love that stuff. And maybe we can help pick out her pimptastic new wigs!
  
• Still no results from the genetic tests. However, it will not change her immediate treatment course either way. If she does have the gene, they will still need to remove her ovaries soon. Her frozen eggs would be tested for the defective gene before progressing to the next step. She said they can still fertilize them, and possibly use a surrogate if Keri cannot carry the embryos. But the jury is still out on this one. It's amazing what modern science can do these days.
• Egg harvesting means $10,000 in costs---at least---not covered by insurance.
  
• I'm making something right now, which I will share soon, to inspire everyone to donate towards this deserving cause.
  

Such good news! Hooray!

As Keri said, "There really isn't a perfect happy solution but right now, I'm pretty excited about the chance at freezing eggs."

Go go, Ker. And now we can breathe a little easier.

Progress

I've made progress on my bad attitude. I hit a low today at work when I broke down in front of my boss. All it took was her pulling me into her office and asking if I was okay, because I was so quiet today. Miss "I never cry, not even at my own wedding" freaking balled like a baby and it felt so good! My boss is awesome and cried a little with me because she has a daughter my age and the situation hits everyone pretty hard.

Nate worked with me today and we talked on the ride home a lot. He told me I need to open up to him and actually TALK about my feelings [novel idea, huh?]. So I did, and that helped, too.

I also received a lot of very uplifting comments, emails, and messages today which always makes me smile. So thank you, girls. Much appreciated.

Not only that but I found coverage for my trip! I meant to tell you guys about this therapist in my BOTB post because she is 33 and pregnant with her FIFTH child! Freaking ridiculous but the girl is a saint because she is going to work for me. Whoo hoo!

Also, I decided that half of my funk must be blamed on the weather. I try not to even go there anymore on this blog but I swear this winter will never end. Sure we got a 60 degree day last weekend. Big fricking whoop. Check this out:
Yep, SNOW this weekend. And the rain we are experiencing currently is miserable, ice-cold, and gloomy as you would imagine. Not fun. I pray for warm weather in St. Louis next weekend! And then San Diego in a few weeks. Cannot wait.

Other things that make me a happy person:

1. I took it upon myself to become a vet. Not really, but I DID decide to take charge of Henry's anal gland issues. I won't go into detail but if you know me, you know I love grodie stuff like this. Here are some pictures of my procedure--Nate says my smile is totally creepy. I have no idea why I find these pictures so funny and I'm sorry if they are in bad taste. Blame my loss of sanity this week:)


2. My good friend Allison, who lives in Maryland, has decided to buy tickets to Kansas, too. I wasn't sure if we'd be able to time our "Keri trip" on the same weekend. But this makes me even MORE pumped for May 2-4. Here is a classic picture of Allison and I on my 21st birthday [drinking grape juice of course]:


And here are the three amigas in full force on Keri's 22nd birthday, 2003. This is our classic pose in case you haven't noticed:
Here we go again, 'Julia the Giant' with her little friends, 2002:

Ah, the memories of this night, 2003:

My God we are pale in this picture!

I can't even put into words how happy I am to reunite with my girls in a few weeks. It is going to be a much needed vacation for all of us!

3. Another thing that makes me happy is looking through my old scrapbooks and reminiscing. Hence the pictures you just viewed. I love daydreaming of our college days when our biggest worry was a killer exam or choosing an outfit for a night out. It's also quite amusing to watch us grow up through the years. Check out my hair, for instance: short to long, brown to blonde, curly to straight. Ah, the those were the days----when I could stomach paying for highlights:)

Here is another trio that always spelled trouble: Me, Megan, and Keri. Again, PTs tend to make up for lost party time pretty quickly. The library couldn't hold us down, baby!

New Years Eve 2005, immediately after we graduated with our masters. We were obviously wise beyond our years. Also, please note the camera around tourist Keri's neck:


Then there was that PT graduation trip to Mexico in December 2004. I love this shot of us girls!

4. Keeping with the theme of reminiscing through pictures, look at these jewels I found of me and Keri:

Kissing our big muscles. Yes, we actually posed for this picture. It's totally normal for us:)
Mardi Gras, 2004. We were so proud of our $20 rubber ducky beads. Whose idea was it to buy such overpriced items?!

Here we are in Mexico again. Did I mention that Keri and I participated in a dance competition against each other? Read her [and Allison's] blog spotlight here for details:)
OMG I forgot about this picture! While in Cancun, we decided to get a stranger to take a group picture. Well, said stranger got a little out of control with my little 35mm film camera and seriously snapped like 50 pictures. I was ticked because she wasted my film! Here is the picture that Keri calls the "model shot" because our hair is blowing in the wind. I'm thoroughly ticked and Keri is still grinning away!

Keri's 21st birthday. I did, in fact, make her shot book. It was completely fab from what I remember:)

At Chris and Steph's wedding, June 2005. Was it really that long ago?

Best. Picture. Ever. The year? 2003. The reason to party? The start of another semester. And we broke it down like champs.

Oh my, remember Party Pics? Total rip off but so funny. Here we are, dancing together, and holding it down for The Lou. True gansta style. We were hard core, you guys. Please notice the size difference between my palm and Keri's. I am a total Neanderthal.
What a fun trip down memory lane. I love it.

5. The last reason I'm in a better mood? The Office returned tonight. And it was hilarious. I love that show [and Jim!] so much it hurts.

So yeah, I'm much more mentally stable at the moment because of the above items. I hope you enjoyed the trip to the past like I did.

one more update...

I talked to Keri today on the phone! It was such a relief to hear her voice.

For those of you who don't follow her website regularly, the big news is that Keri has to decide whether or not she will freeze her eggs for future children. Chemo will likely shut down her ovaries for an extended period of time. There is no guarantee that she will ever ovulate again which is to say she might begin menopause at the tender age of 26. Talk about a hitting below the belt, stupid cancer. It's a hell of a disease, huh?

So the infertility treatments would increase her chances of someday having viable eggs for conception but of course, nothing is certain. Even with the hefty price tag of $10,000 for this procedure the doctors say it's not guaranteed to work. I was worried that they'd have to inject Keri with all kinds of hormones and extract the eggs with a giant needle----something that I don't think her body needs right now. But she assures me it really isn't so bad and only takes about three weeks for the whole process.

Her family is planning a fund raiser to help with these gigantic costs. Check her website here for more information on that. It goes without saying that any donation would be appreciated. None of us are rich and powerful [unless some of my readers are holding out on me!] but every little bit helps.

Keri is feeling much better than expected. Sure she has three drains coming out of her body. And she can barely lift her arms without a sharp pain. But she says her pain meds are the bomb [my words, not hers] and her temporary expander boobs are bigger than she anticipated. Basically she is the same size as me right now--and she compared herself to a middle schooler, thank you very little-- but of course hers will be magically pumped up over time:)

On Wednesday she meets her Oncologist for the first time, along with three other doctor's appointments. Obviously, she'll know a lot more at that point about her future treatments. But overall Keri is kicking arse already. And I can't wait until I fly out for my Kansas visit. Now I just have to get a day off at work and buy some tickets. Seriously, I can't wait.

Oh, and she got my package so now I can show you what I sent:
A journal and magnet from Papaya along with homemade cookies that mysteriously disappeared before Keri could taste a single morsel. I guess that means they were good?

Anyway, I know a lot of you are thinking of her and wandering what is new. So there you go, straight out of her mouth [sort of].

Keri update

Keri's aunt just called me because, even during recovery, Keri is one organized lady [a quality I just happen to LOVE] and provided a list of friends for her family to call tonight. And I made the list! :)

Her aunt said everything went well. She got out of surgery at 6 pm [kind of late b/c the doctor was late, I suppose] and is recovering nicely. Her aunt said of course Keri had a million questions prepped for the doc, too. That's my girl!

Unfortunately, they did find 'microscopic' cancer cells in her nodes. Her doctor was disappointed to find affected nodes but Keri took it like a champ and "is okay with it" according to her aunt. We can't jump to conclusions just yet but I'm assuming this means chemotherapy will be a must. Not sure about radiation, too, but we'll see. But the surgery is over and done with and now everyone can breathe a little easier.

I want to thank you girls for commenting on her website. I'm pretty sure I saw about 13 of you blog readers over there and it really warmed my heart. I've been kind nervous and stressed all day long just thinking about her but coming home and reading that it went well and seeing the massive amount of support for Keri really helped.

I called Keri on my way to work this morning and left a message, thinking she was probably way too busy to call me back. But sure enough, a few minutes later she called back. She said she was in the shower doing her "3 minute scrub down" to the girls to prep for surgery. She said she had some bonding time with them since it'd be their last time together. Somehow that is the funniest and saddest thing I've heard in awhile. Her sense of humor is definitely still going strong! But before the surgery she was doing well---very nervous and only a little sleep, but she said something that shows her strength. She said, "You know, I just keep telling myself that this surgery is getting rid of the cancer and that is a GOOD thing. I can't focus on what I'm losing because it's a positive treatment."

So thank you again for being such an awesome virtual support system. I'm sure Keri will be back to her old self in no time, posting up a storm on her sight and loving all the new comments:)

UPDATE [again]: I guess she's already begun chemo according to her sister, Lyndsey, who posted on her website. Come to think of it, her aunt did mention something about injecting the lymph nodes with chemo right away. So I guess that answers the 'chemo versus none' question!

Good vibes, please.

Tomorrow, Wednesday April 2, Keri will undergo her bilateral mastectomy. I posted about this devastating situation last week but I feel like I need to reiterate now, the night before her surgery.

Keri will find out immediately after waking from her surgery whether or not her lymph nodes are affected. Obviously, this is a pivotal factor in her recovery. I spoke with a co-worker today who went through this surgery and she did not have nodal involvement but they still encouraged her to take chemo. So I suppose clear lymph nodes doesn't necessarily mean she can avoid chemo but who knows? Maybe this surgery could be enough of a treatment and she can begin to move forward with her life without chemo or radiation. One can only hope and pray, right?

She doesn't visit her oncologist until next week, and then she will know more about chemo versus radiation versus nothing at all.....but let's all keep Keri in our thoughts and prayers tomorrow.

Also, she has begun a little website so people can follow her journey. It's not a true blog but it's pretty sweet. If you want to visit or leave her a note on the guestbook [which she's admitted she LOVES] go for it! Her link is here. Keri finally succumbed to the wonderment of the internet for virtual interactions with strangers. I KNEW she'd love to do this type of thing!

Also, I may or may not have shipped a fun little package to our girl this morning. Here is a little sneak peek. I love this store!


So here's to a smooth and successful surgery, Ker. We love you! Good vibes from all of us!
[I apologize for the rather ridiculous picture but this was during my bachelorette party. And Keri looks super cute, it's just the innocent bystanders [ahem, Lindsey, Kristen and Megan] that look intoxicated:) ]

Reality Bites

Something has been weighing very heavily on my heart since Monday and I just got the okay to blog about it. What good is a blog about my life if I can't talk about something this important?

On Friday, March 14 one of my best friends was diagnosed with breast cancer. She is only 26 years old and does not have a family history of cancer. Cancer---one of the scariest words in the human dictionary---is supposed to be something that affects those much older than us. Not that advanced age makes this diagnosis any easier, but it just seems incredibly unfair. Why Keri? Why now?

So many questions and so little time. Where do I even begin?

Keri has been diagnosed with invasive carcinoma of her right breast. The doctors will conduct genetic testing to discover the source of this disease, and if it is genetic she has a high risk of ovarian cancer as well. Her sister would need to be tested and any future children would also run a risk of these genes.

There is no other option but for a total mastectomy. As if that isn't enough of a blow, Keri will undergo a double mastectomy on April 2 to eliminate the chance of recurrence in the healthy breast. Keri, someone who has always been known for her perfectly perky boobies and characteristic curly hair, will have to say goodbye to a part of her body. I cannot even begin to imagine what this loss will feel like for her, or for anyone else in her position.
They don't know if she will need chemotherapy or radiation. They don't know if the cancer has spread to her lymph nodes. But if chemo is required, Keri will need infertility treatments to freeze her eggs for future children. And she'd obviously say goodbye to her "Keri curls."

She will opt for bilateral reconstruction which takes an entire year to achieve, and will certainly be a surreal healing experience in itself. Keri will be forced to take large amounts of time off from her job as a PT as she recovers from multiple surgeries, which means a lot of downtime to think and analyze---something we both love to do:) And although thankfully, most of these medical treatments will be covered by her insurance, she will still experience some financial strain as well. Cancer definitely affects every single aspect of your life, huh?

All of these facts combined are enough to shut down your brain. It's difficult for me to wrap my mind around all of this because it's happened so incredibly fast and now her life will be forever changed. Heck, everyone close to Keri will be changed. It's hard not to get philosophical when life's fragility hits you square in the face. Wake up call, indeed.

She found this lump on her own and had the courage to make the doctor's appointment for inspection. As a fellow hypochondriac I'm sure that was a difficult decision because how many times have we convinced ourselves that "It's nothing, I'm sure it's all in my head and will go away soon"? Kudos to Keri for being mature enough to face this cancer---I'm not sure I would be as strong.

I'm not writing this to depress you or to scare you [although it definitely depresses and scares the hell out of me!]. I'm posting about this because I know Keri would appreciate words of wisdom, bits of encouragement, and just to have moral support in this frightening time of her life. Keri is loved by all but every little bit helps, right? Even virtual support from total strangers.

I'm sure many of you have been affected by cancer in some way or another. Well, I know for a fact some of you have seen a loved one go through this same type of thing. What has helped you survive your darkest moments?

Because right now I'm thinking a good old fashioned hug would do the trick but with 700 miles separating us, I'm dealing with limited resources. I see a trip to Kansas in my future:)