These are my confessions

(cue Usher, please).

Confession | I have been keeping a secret from you all. Cecelia's hair? It may appear completely normal as it graces this precious head. But the truth is that she has some wicked awesome bangs. Like ridiculously long, scraggly, and hilarious bangs. As in, I have to style my itty bitty baby's hair in a comb over...like an 80 year old man. I will show you now and then pretend like I didn't flash you my baby's weak spot/imperfection.









She basically has a hair loss pattern that is the exact opposite of her fathers: tons of hair on top and everything else is fading away. Combine her and her dad together and you'd have one nice head of hair, and one complete cue ball. I think I might coin this particular hair-do as one of the following, and I'm taking votes in the comments section of this post so that the public opinion may be heard:
1. Bitchin' Bangs
2. Female Flat 'Hawk
3. Opposite of Male Pattern Baldness
4. Anti-Mullet

Confession | I haven't taken the time to actually edit images in a LONG time. But when Nate was present for a dual bath on Friday night, I could feasibly handle my nice camera while daddy prevented any drowning incidents. And then I edited a few pictures which somehow made me all emotional and profound and feeling like, 'Man--having my two little babes in a bath together is pretty much the sweetest thing in the world. And I will absolutely look back on moments like these on the future and miss it so much.' I love when I have those time-stopping realizations. These are hard days but they are amazing. And when life finally slows down again and my kids are all grown up I will yearn for a time when they both fit inside a bathtub together. When they both needed us so much. When we were doing the hard work of shaping little lives and teaching them how much we adore being their parents. I'll miss it someday. No matter how challenging it can be to raise two small kids, it's worth it times a million.

Anyway, the pictures. I got a few of them in the bathtub that make my heart hurt and my head spin into the future. :)











Confession | Sometimes I want to be like, 'Offspring. I have decorated two very nice, very comfy rooms for you buggers. You need to sleep in your respective rooms. Do you know how much work it was to paint your crib pink, Cecelia?'


'And you, Truman. Remember when we promoted you to this awesome big boy bed that your Dad used to have as a kid? That is where you belong.'


You two do not belong in mommy and daddy's ever-shrinking queen bed. It's getting crowded in there and dad claims that he is dangling off the edge of the bed 90% of the time. But really? When you do wake up at 5 am, Truman, and ask to come into bed with us (where your sister has already been since about midnight)---it's worth the cramped quarters to see things like this. When Truman remains asleep and a delightfully happy Cecelia smiles away at the camera. And yes, that IS his hand on his sister. Could you die?







Confession | I got the kids early from daycare on Friday and therefore didn't get to partake in my much-anticipated Starbucks free drink I had been salivating over all day long. So I decided to get really wild. And after nursing Cecelia I convinced Truman to walk to Starbucks with me. It was 39 degrees outside and RIGHT before dinner, but I just had to have it. And so I bundled little miss up in her big brothers huge 12 month bunting and off we went. It was cold during our walk but refreshing. The fancy Skinny Carmel Latte that I got? Heavenly. And Truman's first ever scone? Total success. We managed to eat dinner shortly after and I was proud of us for doing something so spontaneous!









Confession | I got my hair did. I wanted to go even shorter but a last-minute conversation with my husband left me feeling a little nervous about chopping it off completely. Nate and I have been together for more than 10 years and apparently he just now had the courage to tell me that he likes me with long hair. The only problem with that? I'm still going through the dreadful post-partum hair loss stage. I could practically make a wig with all of the lost hair on our bathroom floor. It's disgusting and now is not the time to grow my hair out like a supermodel. And so? Before and After.



And Nate says he likes it:)

Confession | I think my baby is so cute that it makes my eyes bug out of my head, my heart aches, and I can barely stand it sometimes. Seriously. This girl is too much!



(snoozing on the couch looking an awful lot like her big brother)


Confession | I'm kind of obsessed with going to the gym at 5 am. Which is a big deal since I was the one who didn't want to waste money on a gym membership. And now I love it. I went 5 times this first week of our membership and I swear to you it's changing my attitude about life. Sleep deprivation is no match for the endorphins of exercise. Even at 5 in the morning. If nothing else it's a fabulous way to carve out some 'me' time in the day and it provides me with a ton of energy, too. The feeling of accomplishment lasts a long time after I'm done working out and I'm happy Nate convinced me to fork over the money. This might be the third time in the history of our marriage that I admitted he was right. Enjoy it, Nate.

(posting a sweaty face picture of myself without makeup, at 5 am is a VERY questionable decision)


And while we are on the topic of the gym, I totally busted the zipper off of my 'Giant Breastfeeding Sports Bra' the other day. I was devastated of course, since this baby had lasted me all the way through the year of nursing Truman and 5 months with Cecelia. How was I to go on with running as a breastfeeding mom? I considered getting the same Under Armour bra as the first go around but when I tried the new ones on in the store they just didn't seem to fit the same. And then I found this bad boy. And fell in love. It has all of my requirements: no underwire (clogged ducts are too painful!), molded cups (for modesty in a cold gym), non-pull over style (because I really don't feel like dislocating my shoulders every time I need to nurse after a work out). It's amazing. Even better than my first love of a big-tat sports bra. And I really think someone needs to market a nursing sports bra to us ladies of the world who like to mix breastfeeding with exercise. It needs to be hard core supportive, obviously, and I was really disappointed with the options out there.

And you guys? I'm definitely still a freaking D cup right now because I tried to get away with a C in this bra and about cut off circulation to the girls in the process. I mean, a D cup? Really? I've always been an 'A on a good day' type of girl. Nursing is amazing for hundreds of reasons, but the porn star boobs are near the top of my list right now.

These are my confessions. Carry on.