Surreal {Hidden Baby Chronicles}

Thursday, November 7:

I'm chasing two giggling creatures around our house, and all I can see are her sweet ringlets bouncing up and down. His right-sided dimple. The sheer joy in their laughter as their mom chases them in circles.

We stop for a water break. Truman requests that he hides and I find him, but first I have to 'get' CC. I lunge at her, pick her up and swing her little body around. She begs for more. My first born is hiding under the table and yelling for me. Both of their tiny, innocent voices screaming for 'mama'. That's me. I'm their mom.

And I get to do this a third time? I can't wrap my head around it quite yet, since those two dark lines just smacked me in the face 48 hours ago. Two lines, and forever our family is changed. We are going to be a family of five. Cecelia is going to be a big sister. Truman is going to be the oldest of three. Is this a dream? I have no idea if I'm a little over four weeks pregnant or possibly six weeks into it. All I know is that I'm pregnant. Just typing those words makes my heart flutter.

I glance up at our photo wall as we continue our race around the lower level. Moments in time frozen in black and white, including our wedding day, a newborn Truman, a family of three, a newborn Cecelia, a family of four. What will our family look like next year at this time? How many more BIG moments await?

I'm overwhelmed with a sense of gratitude. Our life is not perfect, it's not always easy, but it's so incredibly good. I'm not sure what I've done to deserve all of this, but I'll take it with a lump in my throat. Thank you, God, for this third child as the final piece to our family puzzle. Please keep this baby safely growing inside me, keep my head clear and full of positive/trusting thoughts, and be with us. Be with us on each step of this awesome adventure.

12 comments:

  1. So sweet, love this! I feel the same way and that's why we're on the fence for 4!! Kids are just so awesome, keep you young and having fun! When else would you be running around your house chasing people unless it was with kids!

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  2. Julia - Why are you making me cry? I feel exactly the same way. I look up at our family photo with the four of us and I try to imagine a little girl in the middle of us. It is so surreal. But it's happening! Pregnancy is so so so amazing!

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  3. So sweet. My 3rd is 6 mo. and it still feels surreal. :)

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  4. Ummm Ben is going to be really pissed at you if these posts convince me to want a 3rd kid. So please post about feeling sick asap, thanks. Oh wait, maybe I'll go read Laura's first tri posts! That's a good idea ;)

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  5. I commented once before, but I really do love your blog so I will comment again! This encompasses exactly how I feel about having this 3rd baby. Life isn't perfect, but OMG, the love for my family, and the fact that I get to do this one last time makes me wonder what I did to deserve to have life this good. It also makes me scared, because I feel like I'm too lucky to have what I have and what will fall apart to make up for all the good that is happening? That's just the paranoid side of me which will never go away.
    Thanks again for sharing your thoughts and congratulations once again on baby #3!

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  6. It was many months after our 3rd was born that it finally sunk in that we actually have THREE kids!
    I swear having babies can be so addictive. It is such a special and beautiful time - so much wonder! Thinking about what they will look like and be like, envisioning your other children with the new baby, etc… I mean, really, is there anything better than meeting your baby for the first time?!
    I am in SO MUCH PAIN while pregnant, and our life is a total zoo, but for all these reasons I just can't say that we are absolutely DONE with 3 kids!

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  7. I warn you, it's addictive. Having a third child reminded me how magical babies are and that I must have a fourth sometime soon!

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  8. Love. My baby fever was a 7. Now it's a 9.

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  9. Our second was also a surprise. She's two months old now and it still doesn't feel real! I think I was kind of in shock for most of my pregnancy and kind of didn't soak it all in. So happy for you that you're taking the time to really enjoy and remember it all!

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  10. you have a lovely way of writing this all out. I feel the same way but could never actually put it into words. The holiday season puts me in an "feeling extra grateful" mood as well. Congrats on the pregnancy, looking forward to following along!

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  11. Julia, these baby chronicles need to come with a Kleenex! So excited for your growing family!

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