Hi there! First off, thank you to Julia for putting together the the Moms Make it Work series, and for allowing me to share my story. I have absolutely loved hearing about how other moms make it all happen in their lives and while there have already been several other stay-at-home-moms who have shared about their lives, I believe that no two situations are exactly alike and we all have something different to offer to the virtual Kumbaya that Julia has kicked off with this series.
So, a little bit about me. I am 31 and I moved to Wisconsin from Telluride, Colorado in 2006. I married Matt in 2007, and we welcomed our son, Michael, in March 2012 and our daughter, Delilah, in October 2013. I am an HR Manager turned SAHM and Matt works in the staffing industry. I (sporadically) keep up a blog over at This is the Life, and I (also sporadically) Instagram under the name sierras11. I am still pretty new to being a stay-at-home mom (only since Delilah was born), but I think I’ve found what works (for us, for now) and I’m excited to ramble on a little bit about it all.
First off, I think we can all agree that being a mom is hard, no matter which way you slice it. It just is and, as long as you’re doing the best that you can, I don’t think that there is any “wrong” way to be a mom to your kids. When Michael was born, I was young and naive and didn’t really know how to be a mom yet. Everyone and their four friends wanted to tell me how to do it (because, apparently, being a parent at any time in history makes one an expert qualified to dispense advice). Fortunately, I found that it came pretty naturally to me and I’ve always done what feels right to ME — it’s not always the most popular decision and it doesn’t please everyone, but I guess parenting isn’t always a popularity contest. I never really paid much attention to everyone who was judging how I chose to be a mom and I didn’t give the so called “mommy wars” much thought. I am the expert on raising my children and no one knows them like me. It’s with this attitude that I take on parenting and it helped me get through some tough times and really helped my transition to two kids go smooth like pudding.
Anyway, on with Julia’s questions!
What is your background story? What was your career/schooling before you became a mom? And now where are you?
Like I said, I am originally from Colorado and went to the University of Colorado in Boulder. I thought I wanted to be an engineer (math nerd alert!), but ended up hating the engineering classes. Then I thought I wanted to be an architect, but hated that, too. I ended up rocking a public speaking class that I took to fill some Gen Ed requirements and thought that was pretty cool, so I came out of there with a degree in Communication. Still having no idea what to do with my life at that point, I went on to get my real estate license and moved back home to Telluride to work in the real estate industry for a few years after graduating.
While in college, Matt and I started dating, but went our separate ways after graduation. But, he just couldn’t quit me and we started a long-distance relationship for a while before I agreed to move to Wisconsin to live with him. I got my broker’s license in Wisconsin and started practicing here. We got married and opened a mortgage brokerage together. I was still working in real estate and also managing his office/assisting with loan closings. It was a lot of fun, but also a lot of work — I got to work with my best friend every day and we took our dog to the office with us, but we also were responsible for employees and we put in long hours in the interest of keeping things going.
As you may be aware, the entire real estate industry took a nose dive a few years ago and we closed the business. I landed a job at a development company, working in the accounting department (remember, math nerd!). It was my first “corporate” job and I struggled with the structure quite a bit. But, the steady paycheck (when I was only ever used to commission pay) was pretty nice. But, it was just a job that paid the bills and it wasn’t really what I wanted to be doing for the rest of my life. I should also mention here that I am a really, REALLY good employee. I don’t just say that to make myself feel warm and fuzzy or to toot my own horn. I was ALWAYS there — I worked through my lunches, I stayed late, I followed the rules, I never took sick days and I always went above and beyond expectations. It’s just who I am. I put my everything into any job that I do. Apparently, it paid off, because two years into it, I was promoted to be the HR and Office manager, and it continued through added responsibility, significant raises and bonuses, additional vacation time and glowing performance reviews.
I had no HR experience beyond what I picked up while working with Matt, but I was up for the challenge and learning experience. It was such an amazing opportunity and I LOVED it. The company is small (less than 50 employees) and there are offices throughout the country (with most employees being at the headquarters office in downtown Milwaukee). As time went on, I was given more and more responsibility, which was pretty cool. Not only did I handle everything HR related (personnel, benefits, payroll), but I also managed the IT systems (always plagued with problems and such a thankless job), managed an eight-woman team of administrative staff (hiring, firing, conducting reviews and directing workflow) and kept all of our offices running (managing phone systems, managing copiers, ordering office supplies, etc., etc.). I often joked that I had the jobs that no one else at the company wanted to do, but my responsibilities really were endless. The benefit of working for a small, lean company is that there is such opportunity to grow and always be challenged, but also that everyone ends up doing more work than what they might do elsewhere. With all of this responsibility, though, came long hours in the office and my work following me home most nights. I was always “on call” and constantly monitored my email at all hours of the day and all weekend and kept my phone readily available at all times. It was a pretty high-stress job, mostly due to the personalities and somewhat demanding nature of my coworkers and superiors, but I found that I thrived on that stress.
I honestly hadn’t given much thought to whether I would work when I had kids or not, but I was loving my position. After one of my annual reviews, I distinctly remember thinking to myself “I am SO not giving up this job when I have kids.” But, then I got pregnant and my feelings slowly started to change. After one particularly brutal day and night in which I had to oversee a server migration at six months pregnant and I went in to work at 7:30 AM and didn’t come home until 2:30 AM the next morning (and only then after I called Matt to come get me because I was so delirious that I didn’t trust myself to drive home), I questioned a little bit if I wanted (or even, if I could) to continue this once I had babies at home.
When Michael was born, things definitely changed. I really didn’t want to do the long hours and the high-stress. My maternity leave with him was so awesome, yet so stressful for me. Awesome in that I could relax not having to worry about work and nothing in the world was more important than taking care of my baby. But, super stressful in that every day brought me one day closer to having to return to work. I thought about it every single day and I had a pit of dread in my belly over it. I hated that I was “wasting” my time off counting the days, instead of doing everything I could to enjoy them, but I couldn’t help it. I went back to work on a Friday and the weekend before I did (on my first Mother’s Day, no less), I had a total emotional breakdown and told Matt that I just couldn’t do it. He told me he would support my decision, whatever it would be, and that he just wanted to see me be happy. He maintained that position the entire time, which was almost overwhelming in that the decision was left entirely up to me.
A few things sent me back to work, though. First, I told them I was coming back. I just am not the kind of person who can say I’m going to do something and then just not do it. I had to honor that commitment. Second, I needed to try. The last thing I wanted was to not go back to work and find myself regretting it, with no job to return to. Even though I was 95% sure that I wouldn’t regret staying home with Michael, at least if I tried and it didn’t work out, I would know, instead of being left wondering what it would have been like. So, I went back to work. It was no less stressful than before (I never again had to stay until 2:30 AM, but there were nights I didn’t get home until around 9:00). In fact, it was probably more stressful now. I didn’t get home until after 6:00 every night and it was always a mad scramble to eat dinner, do bath time and get Michael to bed and then it was wash bottles, do laundry and get everything ready for the next day. I only saw Michael a little over an hour each day and it just wasn’t enough. I kept wondering how much time had to go by before I could honestly say I gave it a fair chance. Oh, there were lots and lots of tears on my part that summer, as I tried to make it work and find a happy balance. I really felt like I wasn’t measuring up at either “job”, which I know is a common feeling for working moms, but it was something I really struggled with.
Months wore on and I didn’t make a move. I was still taking on more and more responsibility. It just never seemed like a good time to say “hey, by the way, I’m going to stay home to be a mom.” So, I just kept on plugging away. At my review that year, I found myself in a great position to ask for what I wanted — part-time status and/or the ability to work from home. My boss (the President, which totally worked to my advantage when it came to getting what I wanted) was really great and pretty enthusiastic about helping me out with my situation, so he told me I could work from home every Friday. I was so excited about the opportunity and I really thought it would help me balance things out. I should have known better, because it just didn’t work. With the volume of work I had, and the nature of my position (not only as HR, but as a manager of a team of people, I needed to be present and available, and set an example for everyone else), I just had to be in the office. I think I worked from home maybe five times before I just gave up on the idea and stopped trying.
Right around that time, I found out I was pregnant again. We’d always said that once we had two kids, I would probably stay home. But (and, I think I must have been crazy), I actually considered returning to work after Baby #2 was born. But, that was only for about a minute when I realized that I didn’t want to go back and, more importantly, I didn’t need to. They kept asking and I kept avoiding the question, telling them that I honestly didn’t know if I would come back or not. I wanted to be fair and give them plenty of notice, so I set a deadline for myself and informed them of that date as the day I would solidify my decision. I was still pretty wishy washy up until that date, and there were several days leading up to it that I woke up and told myself “today’s the day…I will walk into his office and resign.” And yet, I didn’t. It was really, really scary to even think about, let alone say the words. Finally, he walked into my office and we basically had a “I’m not leaving this room until you give me a firm answer one way or the other” conversation and I told him that, sorry, I just wasn’t coming back.
Finally saying the words and resigning from my position was so liberating! Once it was out, I just knew I was making the right decision and I no longer second guessed it. Two weeks before Delilah was born, I said goodbye to that place and I’ve never looked back (it was very sad to say goodbye though). I know that I made the right decision and I know it would have been the right decision back when I struggled with it after Michael was born, though I am still grateful for the experience and I am glad that I did go back to work so that I do know and wasn’t left wondering. As difficult as it was at the time, I think being a working mom for that year-and-a-half really helped me in that “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger” way that really challenging things tend to do to someone.
So, now I’m here, a full-time mom to my two beautiful kids. In total cliched fashion, there are days we don’t change out of our PJs and live a life of leisure (ha!). But, there are also days that we’re on the go all day long. I spend my days covered in spit up, smeared toddler food and sometimes poop. It’s pretty much the opposite of glamorous, but it’s also pretty awesome.
What are the best parts of your situation? What are the biggest challenges?
The best parts are that I get to spend every day with the two most amazing little people I know. I love having the flexibility that comes with not having to rush out of the house to get to daycare and work. I love watching my kids grow up and it’s pretty awesome to go to bed knowing that I play a part in their development and growth each day. Really, I could go on and on about the best parts of being a stay-at-home mom, but I won’t. Hopefully, they’re pretty apparent to most everyone.
My role is full of challenges, though, and I will speak to those. First off, I am a worrier and, even though I know we’re okay (or we wouldn’t even be in this situation), it’s pretty stressful having only one income. Not only does it stress me out, but I know it stresses Matt out — it’s a lot of pressure on him to be the sole breadwinner for our family, and I know he feels it. He is such an incredible person and he would do anything and everything to provide for his family, but that doesn’t mean it’s always easy. We’ve had to cut a few corners and scale back on a few things, but it’s definitely worth it and I’d much rather eliminate some of those things if it means being able to do this. Plus, things like lunches out, fancy shoes, maintaining a business wardrobe, etc. were easy to cut out, as I just have no need for them anymore — I eat whatever Michael is eating and wear sneakers/flip flops and yoga pants every day (yep, I’ve fully embraced my “mom uniform” with open arms).
I also really struggle with finding balance and being able to do everything. Ah yes, I thought I would escape that once I became a full-time mom, but no. It’s just a shift of responsibilities. Now that I am at home, I have also become our household manager. I’ve always been the manager of the bills and finances, as well as most of the “adult” things like handling insurance, keeping up with vehicle registrations, etc. But now, I also do all of the grocery shopping, cooking and cleaning (responsibilities that were previously almost entirely Matt’s — yeah, I was a really lucky lady, but he was home a lot more than I was, so it just fell to him). Sometimes, I feel like it’s all I can do to keep the kids alive (slight exaggeration, obviously), so we may not get to the grocery store, and the dusting of all the fine curios may not happen as often as it should. There are a lot of days when I feel like I should be doing so much more than I am (because I’m home all day, and, really, what excuse could there possibly be for not getting to some of those things?). It’s hard to let that go and remind myself that I have two little kids who demand my attention nearly every minute of the day and my #1 responsibility in this “job” is to take care of them. Everything else comes secondary and if it doesn’t happen, well…there’s always tomorrow.
I totally had the stereotypical image in my head of a SAHM and thought I’d have more free time once I left work. So, I know it sounds pretty dumb, but it’s a challenge for me to adjust to the reality not being quite what I imagined in that arena. This job requires me to be present all of the time. Not that I ever called in sick when I reported to someone else, but there are no sick days, no personal days, no vacation days here. I can’t phone it in and I go to bed feeling badly if there is a day when I didn’t give it my all and let the kids watch more TV than they should have because I didn’t feel up for the challenge.
Finally, what I see as one of the most important challenges that I’m faced with is keeping my kids engaged and entertained, without totally over-scheduling them for activities. Up until recently, Michael was still going to daycare a few days a week. I really struggled with the decision to withdraw him from the program entirely, because he had friends there that he really liked. It also really helped me to ease into life with two kids with him going to daycare a few days, as it gave me time to bond with Delilah. Now, I try to make sure we get out of the house at least once a day — whether it’s to go to gymnastics class, play group or just to Target — as I think it does wonders for everyone’s sanity. Like I said, I don’t want to over-schedule us, so I pick one organized activity / class each quarter that we can do (right now it’s gymnastics, we’ll probably take the summer off and just spend more time outside and then pick up again in the fall). I could do more than one, and I’m sure it would be fun, but I figure Michael (and soon, Delilah) will have plenty of experience with a loaded schedule when he’s older. For now, I want him to just have fun — he is only two, after all. Some days are more scheduled than others and we are on the go all day long. Days like that are really fun, but they’re also a lot of work with two kids. But, there are also days where I don’t have anything planned and those days just seem to drag on and on. We all get bored and Michael starts to lose his mind and acts out. Then, I know that I need to do a better job at coming up with activities to keep us all entertained. There are evenings that I plan out the next day, just to be sure that we have enough to do so we don’t spend all day watching TV out of boredom (which we’ve never actually done and we watch very little TV, but even then I feel guilty about it because I should be doing something more engaging with Michael). Really, this winter was so long and awful and there were a lot of challenging days when it came to thinking up new things to do — I feel like it was a cruel initiation for me.
I was never a working mom who saw daycare as a bad thing and, in fact, it was one of the reasons I stuck with things after returning to work. I knew it was good for Michael to be in that environment, with other kids his age, and I knew his teachers loved him and were teaching him things that I never would have. So now, not having that element in either of my kids’ lives puts a lot of pressure on me. It’s all on me to make sure that they still get out and have an appropriate amount of socialization, that they learn their colors and their numbers and that they grow up to be polite, well-behaved kids. Yes, I know that these things were always my responsibility (come on, I wasn’t that much of an absentee mom), but having daycare “tag team” it with me definitely helped. Now that I’m going it alone, it’s a little intimidating, but I just have to do the best I can.
Is this how you expected it to be pre-kids?
Yes and no, but mostly no. Yes in that I had a feeling I would want to stay home if I ever had kids, and now I am. But, more no in that I honestly had no idea what to expect. I’ll be totally honest and say that there was a lot of me that didn’t even know if I wanted kids. It was something Matt and I had talked about, obviously, and we both knew we wanted kids, but it wasn’t an immediate priority. And, when I thought about having kids, I honestly had no idea what it would really be like. I think that’s probably the case for most people — as much as you might think you know what it’s like, you really don’t.
However, I will say that after I had Michael and I started considering staying home, my situation now is as close as to what I expected as I think I’ll ever get.
Is this your ideal situation? If not, what is?
Yes, yes, a million times, yes. I had previously thought that if I’d been able to swing part-time at my job that that would have been my ideal. But, knowing that it wouldn’t have been possible and knowing myself, I think that would only have been a temporary ideal for me. I honestly think that I would still have ended up “wanting more” when it came to time with my kids. So, yes, this is my ideal and I really couldn’t think of a single way to improve upon it. A few months ago, a family member paid me the best compliment anyone could ever have given and said “you seem so much happier now than I’ve seen you in a long time.” While I don’t like to think that I was unhappy before, I know that it’s true. At the risk of sounding totally lame and cliche, I have everything I could possibly want.
Do you see yourself making a career change (whatever that means) in the next 5-10 years, or is this current set up staying put for the long haul?
Eh, who knows. I’m sure when I’m done having babies and they’re all in school all day that I will need to find something to occupy my time, but I don’t know what that will be. I do know that I’d like to have a flexible schedule when that happens, so that I can go on class field trips, attend the class parties, etc. All I want to do is be there for my kids, so whatever allows me to do that will be it. However, until that time comes, this is it. As long as I have little kids at a home, I plan to be here with them (barring anything major requiring me to go back to work, of course — gotta do what you gotta do).
How do meals work in your family? Meal planning? How often do you grocery shop? Who does that task in the family?
When I took on being a stay-at-home, I took on all responsibilities when it came to managing the house. So, meal planning and grocery shopping all falls to me. I usually plan out our meals for the week on Sunday, and then do the grocery shopping on Monday. I’ve found that meal planning is the best and only way to tackle the grocery store, otherwise I wander aimlessly, don’t buy the right things (and usually end up having to go back later in the week — ugh!) and spend way too much. With a set menu, I go in with a list of just the necessities and it’s quick, easy and we stay on budget. I do always have a few staples on hand for quick and easy meals that are “off menu” that we can throw together in a pinch if I didn’t make it to the store (which happens occasionally).
How do you keep the house clean? Power cleaning after bedtime? Staying out of the house as much as possible? Cleaning while kids are awake? Purging stuff often?
My house is definitely not always clean. This is another responsibility that falls to me, as the manager of our household. And, to be totally honest, it’s hard for me to fit it in because, during the day when they are awake, my kids are my priority. We also have a dog who HAAAAATES the vacuum cleaner and barks incessantly any time it is running. So, I can’t really do that during nap time, so I have to leave that for times when Matt is home or on the days that our dog goes to doggy daycare. I did establish a cleaning schedule for myself, with the idea that I tackle a little bit each day. This makes it much easier than trying to do everything all at once. Every day, I make sure the dishes get done and pick up general clutter — easier said than done a lot of days, as Michael DOES NOT like to put any of his toys away and they are scattered everywhere. I do a load of laundry every day as well to try to stay on top of it. And, I try to do no cleaning (other than the usual daily stuff — declutter, wipe counters, dishes, clean up of the floors, etc. — and I will also try to do a quick vacuum downstairs) on the weekend when Matt is home so that we can just relax and spend the weekend together. So, basically, my schedule looks like this:
Monday — dust upstairs // clean the master bathroom (this is rotating with one the first week and the other the next), change beds (so laundry this day will be our bedding)
Tuesday — vacuum upstairs
Wednesday — “special” deep clean (windows, clean the couch, clean baseboards, steam clean the carpets, etc. Basically, any of those pesky cleaning projects that need to get done, but always seem so overwhelming when I think of them all at once.)
Thursday — vacuum downstairs
Friday — dust downstairs // clean kids’ bathroom and powder room (rotating)
Most of these things I can get done in an hour or less and I spend about another hour decluttering, doing dishes, cleaning up kitchen and doing a quick clean of the kitchen floors. Some days, I don’t get to my “chore” for the day, and that’s okay with me. My Priority Numero Uno is the kids and keeping them healthy and happy — I would much rather sit and play with them than fold laundry. We also do a tag team power clean any time we are having anyone over (an example of when Matt pitches in to help, even though it’s not really his job). I realize that not everyone would be okay with this, but my time is already limited as it is, and I feel like I already devote enough time to it.
Tips on how you make this work for you?
I know other posters in this series have said that having a husband who is a true partner is huge and I have to say that I totally agree. Matt is amazing and while we both agree that I handle the bulk of the household duties, he is not above helping out when needed. If I’m sick, or stuck with the baby or who knows what and can’t get dinner started, he steps right in and handles it, even after a long day of work. We split bedtime responsibilities and he usually puts Michael to bed while I put Delilah down. He is a co-parent in every way. He’s also one heck of a stand-up guy. Not ever does he make me feel bad if I am still wearing my PJs when he gets home from work, or if I didn’t get to all of my chores for that day. And for that, I love him even more.
I have always felt that I have a good support network to help get me through this parenting thing. The birth hospital where both kids were born has continued to be such a huge resource for us and they host a Moms Group twice a week. I started going when Michael was a week old and made so many friends through it. I make a point to take both kids now and it’s so nice to be able to get out of the house, let the kids play and to talk with other moms who are at various stages in parenting. Some are brand new moms and some are seasoned and on their eighth kid. They have helped me by offering advice on a variety of parenting issues and I’ve returned the favor to some newer moms. I don’t have a lot of friends with kids, so these moms fill the void. We plan play dates and moms nights out outside of group through a Facebook page. It’s fun to watch their kids grow up and to have found such a wonderful group of women. I’ve laughed with these women, swapped kid stories and tips and many saw me cry my eyes out over my return to work. They do wonders for my sanity, and I don’t know what I would have done without them. I have to remind myself that not all moms have access to the same type of support, or know how to go about finding it. My biggest piece of advice to other moms (new or not) is to find support through other moms. Whether you have a group of friends with kids or you find a local moms group, lean on them for support. Seek out some sort of network. Especially in the early days / weeks / months, things can be overwhelming. Having a group of other moms to talk to, be yourself with and learn from is so, so, so important.
Overall, these years with little kids at home can be tough. I often feel like I’m living in survival mode, and everything I do revolves around what makes the day-to-day easier. Even little things like showering at night after the kids are in bed help me to make our days run smoother. Or, keeping Michael in daycare a few days a week really helped me ease into life with two kids. Once I feel settled, I make small changes and push myself to take on more, do more, etc. I have to remind myself that I can’t do it all, and that’s okay. I run this household much like I handled my job and I live by my to do lists and schedules. Everything (and I mean everything) goes on my calendar and I have an elaborate follow-up system in place with reminders, lists and appointments. This is the only way I can keep track of every task I need to complete, especially when I am pulled in a million different directions.
How do you handle mommy guilt?
As far as mommy guilt…it was never a feeling I experienced when I left Michael at daycare and went to work. I mean, yeah, I might have felt badly when he’d pick up whatever illness was going around, and I hated that he was almost always the last kid to be picked up at the end of the day, but I never really saw it as something to feel guilty about. More just a necessary evil that came with the territory of being a working mom. There is, of course, plenty for me to feel guilty about with this parenting gig in general and I constantly wonder if I’m doing enough for them. I just do the best I can and try to not think about all of the things I could be doing. I remind myself that when my kids are grown and they look back on their younger years, everything that stresses me out won’t matter to them. My goal is that they look back and think “our mom was awesome and she did everything she could for us.”
Advice for new moms struggling with returning to work outside of the home? Or struggling to decide if staying home is the right choice?
If you’ve made it this far, you should already know that this was something I REALLY struggled with. New moms, let me tell you — I get it. I know how hard it is and my heart goes out to you and I wish I could give you a hug. But, if I learned anything from my struggle, my advice is to give it a try. Trust me, I know how hard it is and I didn’t believe anyone when they told me, but I am telling you…just try. Unless you know with 110% certainty that you will be staying home, I would encourage you to try going back to work. You may surprise yourself and find that you enjoy it (and that is TOTALLY okay!) and that it helps bring some balance into your life. Or, you may try it and it confirms that you’d rather stay home. But, either way, at least then you know. As much as I didn’t want to do it, I am glad that I went back to work after Michael was born, just so that I would never be left wondering. And, I did surprise myself in that, even if it wasn’t my ideal, I realized I could do it (wanting and being able to are two very different things). There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with wanting to be a working mom, either. Just because I found it wasn’t for me, doesn’t mean it’s not for you — you are setting a great example for your children, your kids are learning and growing in daycare and you are helping to provide a great life for your family. I admire working moms in so many ways and I am the last person to judge a mom for wanting to work outside of the home.
To wrap everything up, I’ll just say…don’t be too hard on yourselves, moms. We have one heck of a tough job, regardless of how we decide to do it. You’re doing the best you can and you should be proud of it. Only you know what works for you and your family and once you find what that is, everything else will fall into place. Find yourself support and rely on it. Allow yourself some time to adjust to the changing seasons in life. Life is too short to be unhappy. If your situation doesn’t work, change it. In this day and age, being a strong woman means having the option to follow your dream and not let anyone make you feel badly about it. Work or stay home — neither makes you weak or a bad mom, and whatever works for your family is the right decision.
Thank you again to Julia for putting this series together! I’ve really enjoyed reading about how other moms make it work, and appreciate the opportunity to share my story!
(read the entire MMIW series here)
Thank you SO much for your post - I'm definitely a little teary-eyed! Not because I'm sad, but how much I can relate to your story! I've struggled a lot with working a full-time job and finding that balance between being a good employee and a good mom... so knowing I'm not alone in this makes me feel a little better :)
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed this!! I think it is SO much harder to be a working mom when you have a job that truly is more than just a 9 to 5, leave it at work type of job. I have a few friends who work in HR and manage people, and yeah. It seems hugely stressful and overwhelming!!! Glad you're getting to stay home with your babies now, I love that last pic of you all in your PJs :)
ReplyDeleteWhat a great post, Sierra! I was looking forward to reading yours since you have done both. I always admired you as a working mom and also wondered how you did it, too, since one hour a day with your kid is not enough, you're right!! And I admire you as a stay-at-home mom, too! It's obvious how much you love your kids and I'm glad your new role is suiting you. :)
ReplyDeleteThanks Sierra! Your "work" personality sounds just like me (as does the putting everything in your phone for "mommy" tasks and your chore schedule...almost matches mine to the day). This sounds so much like my situation with my first kid and helped me evaluate how we're going to approach things with our second baby that is due this fall. I recently scaled back to part time which has been near ideal for wrangling one kid, but makes me a bit nervous for #2, so I appreciate the contrast in your two pregnancies and your bravery for resigning since it was what you felt in your heart was best.
ReplyDeleteThanks again, Julia, for doing this!
ReplyDeleteJamie Lynn -- you're definitely not alone and I know that struggle all too well. Hopefully you can fine the right balance and what works for you!
Erin -- we are all about the matching PJs! (Okay, maybe it's just me and I didn't allow a committee for this decision, lest it be shot down.)
Erin -- you're so sweet. Thank you!
swajud -- congrats on being able to go to part time! I really thought that would have been the best of both worlds for me, but I just don't know how it would have worked. Hopefully it works once #2 comes along, too! Best of luck to you in the coming months.