The American Canine

Hello, world. It is me, Henry, and I'm going to give you my version of the holiday weekend. First of all, my Missouri Grandma sent me and Sammy matching bandannas to wear in honor of the red, white, and blue. The first picture is my least favorite because my scarf is WAY too big and it swallows me whole. I'm so embarrassed please don't flame me:)

But then mommy fixed it and I look like a pimp again.

Sam is always hungry and licking his lips, even during our photo-ops. Sometimes I'm afraid he will eat me.
Then on Friday afternoon, Mom and Dad tricked me into a car ride to see some friends. Their buddy Charlie was in town for the weekend so they wanted to hang out for a bit. No big deal, right? WRONG. Take a look at this monster:

His name is....wait for it, wait for it.... Kevin. He is a 7 week old Soft Coated Wheaton Terrier and Charlie has no idea what's coming in the months ahead. I guess he's pretty cute but he annoyed the crap out of me. Look at this face and tell me he's not frightening:
Of course, Mom immediately asked Dad if we could add to our own family. He shot her down in no time, though, thank goodness. Something about potty training, lack of sleep, and yelping. Here are some visual examples of how crazy this puppy was about me. I can't say that I blame him, though, since I usually have to fight all creatures off with a stick:
After he chased me around and tried to milk me [!] I had to lay the smack down and I growled really loudly, then swiped my paw at his little head. That taught him a lesson or two and then he stayed away from me. Henry: 1, Kevin: 0.
Then Kevin stole my Mom away for awhile and she cooed at him like a baby. Henry: 1, Kevin: 1.
Geez, even Dad would pet Kevin more than me, his own son. Can you believe it?

Please, Mom, don't pretend like you love me. I refuse to look at the camera for you.
Here is Kevin with his Dad, Charlie. So far puppy-dom is treating them okay except for the poopy crate and difficulties sleeping alone. Ah, to be young and free again.

But the best part of my day was when I had to take a leak. So I was going about my business like usual, when Kevin decided to stick his head under my legs to 'milk' me again [I guess I look like his mother?]. My hot stream hit him directly on his little puppy face and he was dripping with my markings. I own him. Henry: 2, Kevin:1. Eat that, little puppy!
So yes, I ruled the holiday weekend, as always. I wonder if I can pee on my parents' future human babies, too? Do you think that would go over well, to prove my dominance? Just a thought.

16 comments:

  1. Henry is so adorable...and quite the pimp! BUT...I NEED THAT PUPPY!!! Seriously, I could die...

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  2. Hey Henry, this is Louie. Your pee in the face move has just given me a GREAT idea for the next time my runt of a brother tries to mess with me. Thanks! Oh, and I like your bandanna. My parents dressed me in drag for the 4th of July. Maybe I'll pee on them, too...

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  3. Holy crap, that is hilarious! Henry totally has a pimp look with his head cocked like that!

    Kevin is adorable, I wouldn't blame you for wanting one!

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  4. Gawsh! Little Kevin ((chuckle)) couldn't be more adorable! But the peeing in the face? Eeew. Poor little guy!

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  5. hi.lar.i.ous.
    Love your blog. Love your dog. And now I want another puppy too. Thanks a lot.

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  6. what kind of dog is Henry? I think he is the cutest thing ever and I am on the market to get a puppy so I definately want to know!!! Thanks :)


    Tiffany in Massachusetts

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  7. I think this is Henry's BEST ENTRY EVER!!!!!! I laughed so hard!

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  8. Oh that was too funny. But a puppy named Kevin...a little odd to me as well!

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  9. I like how Henry could give a crap about Kevin. Too funny. I wanna give Kevin a big hug...but only if he's pee free.

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  10. Soft coated wheaten terrier puppies are the cutest things EVER. Wheatens are cute dogs, for sure when they're adults -- but OMG, they are ADORABLE puppies. My friend had two at once a few years ago, I was in cute puppy heaven!

    Oh and dogs often lick their lips when they're nervous -- maybe Sammy is a little camera shy? ;o)

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  11. Tiffany~Hank is a Cockapoo, mom is a Cocker Spaniel and dad is a Toy Poodle. He's quite the lover.

    And Ellen~My old roomie, Hannah, has a Wheaton named Sampson and Henry met him when he was a puppy. They grew up together and Henry misses Sampson dearly. They are beautiful dogs and puppies for sure.

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  12. Thanks for updating us on what's been going on with you Henry!!! :-)

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  13. I love reading Henry's updates. I love his pee on the face move, lol.

    I wanted to talk to you about running. I want to get into a running routine and since I've never tried before, I wanted to get some advice. If it's easier, my email is oconnell.kari@gmail.com

    Thanks Julia!

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  14. Oh Henry you look so adorable in your new bandana. Sounds like you had a super fun weekend!
    And your new little friend Kevin could not be any cuter!

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  15. i love it when henry blogs! my pup is a cockapoo too. they are so sweet and cuddly.

    also, wanted to let you know that you are the blog of the week on Elizabeth Anne Designs. :) we love reading - keep up the great work!

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  16. Ok, not to be like a 15 year-old girl on myspace, but

    LMFAO!!!!!

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