Baby is the size of a navel orange now, and I'm pretty sure he or she had a major growth spurt this week. Either that, or my uterus suddenly gave in and I've popped. For those that scoff at my bump, just refer back to my four week picture to understand why this seems LEGIT to me. I forgot about how most people are always 'you are so small' to me when pregnant. I don't feel 'small' but I guess it's all relative!
I'm feeling really good overall. I'm hungry and can eat pretty much whatever. I have decent energy and have been walking on the treadmill a little bit. I'm wearing maternity pants for pure comfort but regular pants are 'fine', too. For now. I'll feel the baby kick here and there, nothing consistent yet. Especially in the evening hours, it's 'for sure, not just gas' taps!
My first OB appointment at 14w3d needs recapping here.
Doppler showed the baby's heart rate 152, and I didn't have the guts to tell her I have my own doppler at home. I've been checking maybe once a week lately, but still! She always does an ultrasound in her clinic, and went for it this time, too. It showed a 'big baby' about four inches long, I saw one big movement and the baby's hands were up at his/her face. Beautiful heartbeat. Beautiful baby, so much bigger than last time at 8 weeks! No mention of the bleed, but if baby is 4 inches, the bleed was about 2 cm last time so I'm guessing it would be hard to see even if there.
I'm up two pounds, shocking it's not more. BP was a good 120/63.
We talked about being AMA, and I was preparing myself for her to be a little 'strict' about it, just knowing her personality. She did raise her eyebrow slightly and say, 'you are 35 now?' I am going to get the quad screen at 16-18 weeks, just as I've always done for each pregnancy. I will have my 20 week US with a perinatologist at the hospital instead of going to the clinic with an ultrasound tech like I've done before. This will be pretty cool, I think, because we will get to see a lot and will hear the doctor tell us basically everything right then and there. Also a growth scan at 32 weeks will happen, which again sounds great. When she heard that I was bleeding again before 6 weeks her already slightly concerned face about my age got a little more intense. 'This is when I go into my talk about AMA.'
The baby could be sending us signals that something is not right (because of the early bleed) and any of these things could happen: birth defects, premature birth, or still birth. Great. Fun talk.
I realize she has to say these 'worst case' scenarios to me. And sure, the risk goes up slightly at age 35 for some birth defects. And it's not great that I bled at 6 weeks. But a birth defect is not THAT much more likely now than it was with Porter two years ago. I looked it up and Down Syndrome is a 1/600 chance at age 33 and 1/350 chance at age 35.
And you know what? It's out of my control. This is happening and worrying about all that can happen will get nothing accomplished. Not one thing. I know I will still have my moments when I worry about this baby, but I feel like making a conscious effort to assume the best right now. We will cross each and every bridge that comes along. The first being the Quad Screen in another two weeks. Then the big ultrasound.
Today I am pregnant and I love my (healthy) baby. I've been worried about each and every one of my babies before this, even without being AMA. This is really nothing different for me, mentally.
Lots of women have healthy babies at and beyond age 35, and I guess I was just hoping my OB would be very 'meh' about my age. I still get to be 'meh' about it if I want to be, though. And I am not going to stress.
She was also super excited for me and I don't want to discount her positivity. She has four kids of her own and said that four is a GREAT number and she just loves my kids, and loves that we are having another. She wanted to see a picture of them and said I should bring them in for a few visits, then marveled at how huge Truman is and at Cecelia's hair. I got a few big hugs, and it's great to be back with her. She knows I had to switch back to my own medical insurance in order to see her and knows that this baby wasn't planned. We talked about our house addition, about the kids, and life. All of my initial blood tests looked good, and I'm all scheduled for going back every four weeks until 26 weeks. It was quite surreal being back in her office again, and even her nurse said, 'You're back! Welcome!'
I mentioned it in my Day in the Life but I'm all scheduled for my 20 week ultrasound on February 16th. That's so soon, it's nuts! Cannot wait. Still thinking girl and kind of just want to enjoy the ultrasound and let the tech tell us the sex while we are in there, so we don't have to turn our heads half of the time. Then the 'reveal' can be more for the kids later in the day or something.
What else? I don't know. Am I supposed to look up my old 15 week posts to compare or something? Haven't done that yet, probably should! I did see this in my Timehop the other day....was exactly 14 weeks along this year, too (since my due date is identical to Porter's).
Bottom line: things are feeling more real, things are feeling positive, baby is tapping occasionally, and I have a feeling the next six months will fly at warp speeds.