October 28, 2016: 'Everything new is fine.'
This phrase, with an image of a new plant sprouting from the ground just randomly appeared in front of me. I opened up the baby monitor app on my phone, then before the camera view appeared, a seemingly unrelated quote popped up for about ten seconds. I have no idea where this came from but it stopped me in my tracks. I nervously chuckled and then promptly teared up, resting my forehead on the doorframe.
Everything new is FINE.
This morning I took a positive pregnancy test. My emotions are reeling, my head is spinning and I can't think straight. I could list a million and five thoughts that went through my head since 8am when I took that test. But instead, I'm choosing to simply hold onto the thought that everything new is fine.
I still have to tell Nate the news. We have so many thoughts to work through together. This is freaking insane. Four kids? It feels like I'm dreaming right now, the most surreal moment of my life. If I get a chance to sort through my thoughts I'm sure I'll be back here, typing away.
Until then: it's fine. FINE. Something new. A new baby. Four.