uh-oh

So my 34 week appointment did not go so well today. At all. Hence why I'm posting a new post at 3pm instead of being at work. Remember how I used to be that pregnant lady sailing through pregnancy without any complaints or concerns from my doctor? I think it's all changed for the time being.

I had a normal morning at work then headed to my appointment at 12:30. They weighed me first, like always, and I admit I did freak a little bit when I saw I gained 6 pounds in the past two weeks*. Next came time for my blood pressure which at every previous appointment has been in the low 120s over 70s or even less, which is perfectly normal. This time? The nurse didn't say anything right away which was my first sign, then said, 'Um, 152/90'. Obviously, that is NOT good and is insanely high for me. So she said she'd step out and let me calm down a bit, then would come back to check again.

Great, perfect plan. Tell a pregnant girl with abnormally high blood pressure that she needs to calm down and be left alone and I guarantee the only thing that happens is she will go over all of the awful possibilities in her mind the entire time, thus increasing her BP further. I'm a medical person so I know this is what happens but I still tried my hardest to breathe, distract myself, and stay calm. You can probably guess that it didn't work worth a hoot.

Nurse comes back in, BP is still 158/90 and so she says the doctor will see me soon, steps out, and then the mental dialogue with myself REALLY begins.

'OMG is she going to put me on bedrest? I'm supposed to work all week and also on Saturday AND Sunday! I have two baby showers on my day off Friday! How are they going to find coverage for me at work? I can't start my maternity leave now or I'll have NO time off with baby boy! And I can't extend my maternity leave or we won't have an income or health insurance! Is this pre-eclampsia? Is my baby dying? Is it because I've gained a lot of weight and now my body hates me? This can't be happening, it's still too early. Oh God, please don't let her say she's admitting me to the hospital right now and wants to take the baby asap. He's not incubated yet!'

You know, healthy/calm thoughts like that do wonders for your blood pressure, right?

So when the doc comes in I don't get my usual smile and 'you are such an easy patient' face. I get a quizzical look and immediately she starts asking me questions. Is the baby moving? (Um yes, like crazy). Are my hands or feet suddenly swollen? (No, my rings still fit just fine.) Any sharp headaches or blurry vision? (Uh, no.) Any nausea or vomiting? (No). Is there any reason to think your water has broken, any cramps or sharp pains? (No, but I might be feeling a little more crampy lately if you really want to know. I was planning on talking to you about that today but it's nothing sharp or really bothersome, just some more discomfort from a giant head pushing on my nether regions.)

We continued to talk it out and of course I mentioned that maybe the reason for my high BP is because of the offensive number on the scale I had just viewed. She was torn about this, since it's never been an issue before when I post big numbers at an appointment. Or maybe it's because of the number itself, that I'm possibly gaining too much weight? Doc assured me that is not the case at all because 6 pounds in two weeks is perfectly acceptable at this stage in the game. She goes on to tell me that she is still perfectly happy with my weight gain, that I'm still a tall skinny person and most pregnant women would kill to look like me, so I'm not supposed to be a headcase about it. Sorry doc, but flattery will get you nowhere at a time like this you know. She also informs me that even her patient who DOUBLED her body weight going from about 100 pounds to 200 pounds in pregnancy did not have high blood pressure so that is not the cause at all.

She thinks it can be a few options: 1. Just a random fluke, brought on by a rushed morning, an increase in stress created by myself by getting weighed first, and nothing to really worry about. 2. Gestational hypertension, which is basically just high blood pressure in pregnancy without any other symptoms. 3. The beginnings of Pre-Eclampsia, which is definitely worst case scenario.

Because she trusts me to be smart and monitor myself, she is not admitting me to the hospital. But let it be known that if my BP goes above 160/90 that is exactly where I am headed. One thing that made me and my doc feel a little better is the final BP she took before I left: 138/90, which is right under her goal of 140/90. Maybe we are trending in the right direction already?

I'm on 'bedrest'---which means no working, no projects around the house, but I can be up to shower/eat/use the bathroom and other things like that as needed. I have to collect 'every drop' of my pee in this giant jug, which needs to be refrigerated between uses, for 24 hours. Totally disgusting to have my jug of pee in next to our milk, by the way. They did blood work to check my liver enzymes and want my pee back for a protein test tomorrow night. Then on Thursday morning I have another appointment with my OB and she will make some decisions based on the blood and urine tests and how my BP has been running at that point. So I have to take my pressures every 2-4 hours and think happy thoughts, since the goal is to be under 140/80 and it absolutely cannot go over 160/90 or I have to call right away and be admitted.

Of course, I have a million thoughts running through my head right now but the bottom line is I'm trying to stay relaxed and think good thoughts. Trying not to over analyze every little ache and pain, assuming that my vision is getting blurry or my stomach is starting to hurt. For someone who can be a little dramatic at times with a hearty imagination, this is going to be tough. And laying on the couch for the next day and a half (if not longer)? OMG, I've always said if I go on bedrest I'm going to go completely crazy. All I am doing so far is thinking of everything I could be doing around the house instead of laying here and it's only been 2 hours since I got home. Not good, folks.

After Googling a little bit about Pre-Eclampsia against my better judgment I realize that this is all out of my control. I didn't do anything wrong to cause this and one of the risk factors is just being a first-time pregnancy. Heck, it's not even officially Pre-E yet and I'm already assuming the worst. Maybe it's nothing. Maybe when Nate gets home and takes my BP it will be absolutely fine and all this will be is just a little speed bump on my way to a full-term pregnancy (with a few extra days off work thrown into the mix).

I read this Bible verse on a friend's Facebook today when I got home, and I usually avoid getting all preachy on here but this totally hit home for me:


Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not unto your own understanding, in all thy ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct your paths.





Wasn't I JUST babbling about letting go of control and letting the Big Guy be boss for awhile? Is this a test or what? Because as my Mom says, I had to give over control to God while I waited for my positive pregnancy test results and here I am doing that again. He definitely knows what is supposed to happen with me and the baby and I'm trying to trust Him right now.

So yeah, not so good but perhaps it will turn out to be nothing at all. I suppose worst case is that my BP gets even higher and we have to go to the hospital 6 weeks earlier than planned. Obviously, the bottom line is that I want my baby to be healthy so I'll do whatever it takes right now but I'm just a tad freaked out as you can see. It could be worse...this could be happening much earlier in pregnancy and could be much more severe, I know. But still.

Say a little prayer if you are the praying type! Here's hoping this is a minor scare and blows over quickly!



*You'll notice I don't talk much about actual numbers of weight gain anymore because I've decided it makes me too much of a headcase to focus on the scale on this public blog. I doubt anyone cares NEARLY as much as I do but let's just say it's hard to wrap my head around what the scale tells me and my inner girl-mentality is struggling at bit with it all. Therefore, no totals will be mentioned on this blog until possibly much after delivery

55 comments:

  1. I am the praying type and I am totally praying for you and little "Carlos"! I am sure everything will turn out A OK in a couple of days! If it's time though then he will do great since you are so far along!! You might just need to get some Preemie cloth diapers :) And then we will get to have all the info we need on that! ;) Keep us posted!! I will have to try and find you on facebook. Stay on the couch!

    Sincerely, Jessie from Virginia

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  2. Oh no!! Well take it easy, limit stress and relax!!!! I hope you and Baby C get those issues worked out!

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  3. Praying for you and baby Carlos! Stay relaxed... read some blogs, watch a girly movie, cuddle with Henry (or Nate!) :) Stay strong!

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  4. I am keeping you and baby Carlos in my prayers! I'm sure everything will work out just fine!

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  5. Oh, Julia! I'm definitely sending prayers for you and baby Carlos. :( I'm with you--hanging out at home and Googling the worst case scenario would make me an absolute basket case. Hopefully you'll be back to normal in no time!

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  6. What a great verse to reflect on, I memorized it awhile to help me get through the tougher moments in life. I will keep you and your sweet baby in my prayers for sure. Best wishes to you both!

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  7. oh girl I'm sorry this happened. I'll totally be saying some prayers that it's just a weird fluke thing and not pre-e.

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  8. Oh man, I am sorry! If it helps, almost this exact thing happened to one of my friends recently. Turned out she was just a little stressed and after a day or two things were back to normal. And, this is going to sound weird, but I also have some relaxation techniques that work for me, sometimes (and they don't involve googling worst case scenarios)! They're a little much to type here but email me if you want. Sending positive thoughts your way!

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  9. Oh, Julia, I'm so sorry! I am hoping for the best for you and little Carlos!

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  10. I've so enjoyed following along with you and your pregnancy as I am only a short 5 weeks behind you. Please know that I am praying for you and your husband in this time.

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  11. Relax and get some rest. I'm praying for you and baby Carlos.

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  12. Here is hoping that a few days rest will have you back to normal :) Thinking of you and sending prayers your way !!!

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  13. I am thinking about you too. I had Pre-E with Ella and it developed very quickly at 38 weeks. Do exactly what you are doing and relax.

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  14. Thinking of you and hoping you rest and take care of little "Carlos"!

    From what I've heard this is very common so I hope you can keep those numbers going down and rest, rest, rest!

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  15. Im thinking good thoughts for you girl! I am sure you are fine, but it's ALWAYS better to be on the safer side when you are carrying precious cargo!

    i'll say a little prayer for you and baby carlos!

    and yes, there is nothing you did so remember that! take care of that baby and REST!

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  16. I'm thinking of you and baby Carlos! Hopefully you can use this time to relax and soak up all this alone time before your sweet man is happy, healthy, and HERE!

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  17. Praying for you and the baby, and sending you a big virtual hug. Now, step away from Google! :)

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  18. ok. i've been reading your blog for a while now, and you are one of the most active, motivated people i "know." I can totally understand why you're freaking out, but here's what NOT to freak out about.

    1. Gaining weight - this is what your body needs to do to develop another HUMAN and you are active and ready to run when carlos comes along...you will be fine!

    2. Resting - you've been traveling, blogging, working, working out and working on endless projects...your body is just telling you to slow down. Try not to focus on bed rest being a negative thing and just think of it as some TLC for the babe. And bust out some dvds and go nuts (Felicity anyone?).

    3. Going to the hospital early - your doctor is just being cautious. If Carlos needs to make an early entry, he'll be in good hands. I worked in a NICU, and let me tell you, those little guys are TOUGH. Crazy strong. It's not ideal, but if it happens, it happens.

    I'll be praying for you guys. It'll all be ok.

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  19. Sending you happy thoughts!

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  20. Saying prayers for you guys!

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  21. Definitely saying a prayer for you! I know how hard it is to "calm down" when faced with a situation. Hang in there -- try to enjoy your time resting!

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  22. Nancykate and Jessica are spot on! Just rest up lady and cast all your cares upon the Lord. :)

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  23. Saying some prayers for you and sending lots of positive vibes your way! I know it's hard, but do your best to relax!!! Maybe some Jersey Shore episodes are needed... :)

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  24. Oh no Julia! I'm praying for you and baby Carlos. I know it's hard to remember this when you're a control freak like we are, but God is in control!

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  25. Prayers and positive thoughts for you and baby C.

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  26. saying a prayer for you!!!

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  27. Deep Breath Momma, Deep Breath. My guess is with resting this weekend and some good sleep. You will be off bedrest in no time. Hugs and Prayers are being sent your way. Umm and your doc was right. I would have killed to look like you when I was pregnant. At 5'4 I only gained 25 lbs but, on my frame it looked more like 60. You are giving Heidi Klum a run for her money with your cute self.

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  28. Thinking and praying for you and Baby Carlos!

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  29. First and foremost, you are going to be fine(!!!!) but I will be thinking about you and praying for you and Carlos.

    Second... now that you have so much time on your hands, I think you should put your creative genious to work and make hilarious lables for your pee jugs. Just a thought.

    Hang in there!!!!!!

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  30. Will absolutely be praying for you, Nate and baby Carlos! Let God wrap you in His loving arms and fill you with peace and comfort during this time!

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  31. If Carlos is as stubborn as you, you'll both be fine ;) I'll be thinking about you, SweetPea! <3

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  32. I hope everything is okay when you go back in tomorrow!

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  33. I am praying for you! I am also the type than get in over my head with the dramatic thinking - I just can't help it sometimes.

    But you've been so super healthy up until this point so maybe it's just a fluke. Hopefully this down time will help your body readjust!

    Hang in there!

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  34. Julia, I am thinking of you and sending positive thoughts to you and baby Carlos. I bet everything will turn out just fine. Stay positive!

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  35. That is scary! Hang in there, you will be in my prayers.

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  36. Oh no! I'm sorry to hear that. Do your best to just rest and relax and snuggle up next to Henry!! Hope this is just a fluke and in a couple of days everything goes back to normal.

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  37. Ok, I feel like a huge dud since I just read this now...12 hours after you posted. I wish I would have seen this last night!

    You absolutely know I'm the praying type and will be thinking and praying for you as much as I can! I know it's scary but just keep thinking positive thoughts and that the creator of this EARTH is watching over you and your baby. Thoughts like that always bring comfort to me :)

    I'm not too knowledgable about pre-clampsia but I have known a lot of girls who had this and each and every one of them delivered healthy, happy babies. It might be a bump in the road, but I think it would be a manageable bump in the road. But here's to hoping Nate takes your BP today and it's back to normal :)

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  38. I'm late on reading this too!! I have no advice other than "try to relax." Easier said than done, I know. I'll be thinking good thoughts for you guys.

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  39. Sorry for the bad Dr. appt! Hopefully it's just a fluke and will go down. Take it easy!

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  40. Oh no, Julia. I am so sorry you are dealing with this. My friend had Gestational hypertension and just delivered her healthy baby girl last night! Stay positive and watch some trash tv while you have the opportunity to rest. Lots of prayers and good vibes coming your way lady!

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  41. I am praying for you and your baby! I am sure it will all work out! Hang in there :)

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  42. Aww Julia, I'm so sorry you're dealing with this! I'm sure everything will be just fine, but of course it's just not something you want to have happen. I will keep you in my prayers, girl! Hopefully it is just a fluke and you'll be back on your feet in no time.

    Take care and enjoy your downtime - once that little man gets here ... well, you already know. ;) But it'll be so wonderful!! You're in the home stretch!!

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  43. I'm sure it's really hard to stop and relax because of all the things you feel like you have to do. Nothing is more important than little Carlos and I know you recognize that and will do what it takes for him to cook a little longer. I hope that this was just a fluke and you can be back on your feet soon. FWIW, my sister had preeclampsia and everything turned out fine. I don't think she enjoyed the bed rest, but my nephew was born late and healthy. I'm thinking about you.

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  44. Oh Julia, I'm so sorry for this new worry that has popped up in an otherwise perfect pregnancy! I really truly hope that it's a fluke and that it's nothing more serious than a stressful day that caused the high BP. Even if it's not, God is with you. Keep praying. I find that it provides me with so much peace in times of uncertainty.

    Thinking of you :)

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  45. I will say a prayer for you. Think positive thoughts!

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  46. Just want to let you know that I am praying for you and your baby boy! I had pre-e so I know just how gross that 24-hour pee collection is :) My BP was normal through the whole pregnancy but spiked up at 37 weeks, which is when I had our healthy and beautiful baby girl. Hopefully the BP goes down, but if not, relax as much as you can. It seems like you've got nearly everything ready for the little guy, so now you just might meet him early! I don't think you could have picked a better verse than Proverbs 3:5-6, so comforting! Best wishes!

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  47. I am definitely sending thoughts and prayers to you and little Carlos. Just try to relax (easier said than done, I know) and hopefully your BP will be lower next time you check! AND don't check Google!!!

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  48. I will also say a prayer for you.

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  49. I said a prayer for you buddy and I said one for little Carlos Amberguesa too. I will be thinking of you both and will keep checking in on you. Try to let you mind relax. Love you chica.

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  50. This sucks Jules. Sorry. Praying for you both.
    And STAY in bed!

    p.s.-the image of the jug of pee in your fridge is killing me.

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  51. You've got the prayers. I hope that you get calming news tomorrow since it is silly to expect you to really relax otherwise.

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  52. I'm so sorry Julia, but try not to panic. I had to pee in the same jug for 24 hours and everything checked out okay. Lots of thoughts and prayers for you.

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  53. i'll absolutely be praying for you and your precious boy. relax, enjoy your time on the couch or in bed. get some rest and take it as a mini-blessing. you're such a great mommy already and your precious boy is so lucky to have you watching over him and praying for him. God's going to take care of this and it's completely in his control.

    thanks for being so candid during your pregnancy. you look amazing and pregnancy completely suits you!: )

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  54. I know this is an old post, but it really hit home for me. My situation was much worse, though. (I'm not trying to compare, but it does help to talk about!) Not only did I have hyperemesis gravidarum and was unable to function through my entire pregnancy, but I also had hypertension throughout. I was admitted to the hospital at 25 weeks for the duration of my pregnancy, and that ended up being only another 3 days. My BP had been 180/110, and then it climbed to 198/136. The protein levels in my urine were the highest my doctor had ever seen. I was due on October 20, 2014, but my daughter was born on July 11th (your son's birthday!) at 25 weeks, 4 days and was the size of a 23-weeker. She had stopped growing due to my pre-eclampsia. She spent 167 days in the NICU, many of them near death, and finally came home this past Christmas Eve.

    It took us 10 years to conceive her, and 9 years to conceive my first pregnancy, which we lost at 8 1/2 weeks. So I can commiserate with your miscarriage, as well. We won't be able to have anymore kids, but I'm holding my beautiful 9-month-old (not quite 6 months adjusted) right now, and she was worth it. :)

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    Replies
    1. Wow, I'm so glad your girl is home and doing well. What a wild ride you've been on!

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