3.09.2008

Beautimous

I've found a moment to myself and the 10 cups of coffee I just brewed, so let's get started, shall we?

First of all, apparently pictures will upload in a timely manner if I send them to Shutterfly first. Which is great and all, except it takes a long time for that extra uploading step and it makes my pictures kind of grainy.

Beautimous #1:
We received the most glorious "save the date" in the mail the other day. I just HAVE to show it to you:) My friend Amber is getting married in Mexico this December and as an interior designer, I should have known she'd have impeccable tastes when planning this wedding. Exhibit numero uno: the fabulous shimmery aqua paper with paisley print. Paisley, I tell you!
I've heard of the ticket style STDs before but my goodness, Amber pulled this one off with flying colors. Not to mention the adorable symbol she uses for their initials~I'm sure she'll stamp that sucker everywhere, as she should because it's fab. And I love continuity in paper products. Especially when it comes to personalized symbols repeated throughout the day. Sigh. Great work, Amber!

Beautimous #2:
Henry finally got his haircut. And the new groomer simply loves him [who doesn't?]. But the greatest thing of all is that Henry actually liked her, too. You see, Henry doesn't like strangers. At all. In fact he hates them so much he cowers in the corner, tremors, and tucks his tail so far under his butt it pokes his little tummy. So the fact that he liked this groomer means we will use her until the day we die:)

Take a look at my little monster before [stoner, dread lock look]:


And after [freaking squeezable and white again]:
Please notice the classic bandanna in a navy blue, which definitely brings out his eyes. Come to think of it blue is probably Henry's favorite color. I mean this wiener dog is his most favorite toy ever and it's blue, too. Look at how he snuggles with it and tell me you don't just want to squeeze the crap out of him.
"Hey, Mom.....did you tell the readers about my vet experience yet?"

Why, no, Henry....I didn't. Because that experience was not a beautimous event and would not tie into the theme of this post. But what the hell, here we go:

Remember how I labeled myself a bad mother for neglecting Henry's yearly check up? I figured there was a good chance he contracted rabies because of my absent-mindedness? Well, I'm off the hook. Rabies vaccines are good for three years so he's not going to morph into Kujo any time soon. But that's where the good news ends.

First sign of trouble: the vet was male. Which in Henry's world means "stranger who will kill me if I let him touch me." Second troublesome matter: when I told the vet about Henry's new hobby of barfing about once a week he did not see the humor in this fact, and really scared me with his questions. Since I'm in a medical profession I know he has to consider the worst options and rule everything out. But he seemed to think Henry hurls a little too much and it could be a sign of something wrong in the GI realm. He told us to keep better track of vomiting episodes and we can go from there. Sweet. Any time I think something could be wrong with my little guy I break out in hives and scoop him up, mumbling baby talk about how he's such a good boy. My mind can't grasp the thought of a sick Henry so we won't even go there.

Third trouble at the vet: Henry's anal glands. I won't go into details but let's just say he's had this little issue for awhile now. And it ain't pretty, folks. Looks like I might be bringing some gloves home from the hospital to express Henry's glands internally. And we'll leave it at that.

So the kicker to this stressful visit: a swift kick in the gut, or more specifically, to our bank account. I've never paid more than $100 at the vet including ALL of his puppy shots, microchip, etc. [St. Louis girls, go to Watson Road Vet clinic if you want a badass vet for a great price].

Can you guess our grand total for three new vaccines [that we probably don't need but they totally sucker you into things like this], anal gland expression [well worth the cost, my friends], physical exam, six months of Heartguard, three months of Frontline, and fecal sample test?

$239.65

Combine that total with his $42 grooming bill and we have officially spent more on Henry than ourselves in the past week. Ah, the joys of living rent-free:) And seriously, Henry is well worth the cost. But I thought you'd enjoy our little adventures:)

On a final note somewhat related to Henry and feces: did you know that if you leave poo outside in 5 degree weather it will freeze solid to the snow? Our front yard now displays a new "frozen ice cube of poo" ornament for all to see. I forgot to bring out a baggie yesterday so I just left it for later. Well now it's completely stuck to the snow and is seriously frozen. I couldn't even break it loose by kicking the hell out of it. Can't you just picture me now, cursing at the log of frozen poo? It was quite a sight, let me tell you.

12 comments:

  1. top notch save the dates! I am inspired to make my invites better than what I have drafted now.

    also, my sister's dog has an anal sack problem also and she sometimes scoots her butt across the floor if it is irritating her...it is both humorous and sad.

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  2. Wow, those STDs are amazing.

    On the bright side, you have the big vet bill but you kncoked out a lot of stuff on that visit. Annual exam, frontline, etc. So he should be set for awhile.

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  3. I think Henry needs his own section of your blog... you've got Misc. Monday, I think Thursday should be 'The Musings of Henry,' just so we can all keep up with what's going on in his life... that way he doesn't have to keep reminding you of things to tell us.. he can tell us himself on Thursdays... just an idea.

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  4. FAB idea, Nikki. I'll run it by the man.

    Kelly and Teresa~ I know, the STDs in real life are even more drool-worthy.

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  5. I almost shot Diet Dr.Pepper through my nose at the thought of you kicking frozen poo. You are too funny!

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  6. Oh, Julia, I definately would like to vote yes to a Thursday "musings of Henry.

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  7. I'm sitting here just laughing to myself like a complete saddo. You're too funny!

    Brings back memories of my childhood dog...He also had problems with his glands that caused him to slide his butt across the floor. :)

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  8. First of all, I am SO in favor of Henry having his own day on the blog. I love me some Henry. Second, Lola went for her annual check-up last month and the total was a whopping $267. It's a good thing we love them!

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  9. I definitely feel your pain on the Henry issues. Lola has had such issues these past couple weeks. I keep wondering when it's going to end. I'm sure he's just fine! Keep your chin up...you're a great mom :)

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  10. I immediately thought of you after opening my Save the Date and wondered if it would make it to your blog. Not surprised that they did as they are quite glorious indeed.

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  11. I'm so glad other people feel the wrath of anal glad leakage. It's quite disturbing. And I'm glad I'm not the only one spending lots of dough on my doggie.

    Anna~hello! Yay for your first comment!

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