Hidden baby chronicles: The Reactions

July 19, 2009

Were you wondering about this one?
Reactions to the pregnancy...

From Nate:

On that fateful Monday, July 6, Nate was at class all day while I just so happened to be off of work. I took my positive test around noon that day and spent the next 4 hours freaking out, calling my OBGYN for an appointment, freaking out some more, and sitting in a catatonic state for awhile so the news could sink in to my own mind.

Then Nate got home and although I had intentions of telling him in some cute way, my excitement got the best of me. I was sitting on the couch with the test hidden behind me when he came in and my heart was pounding so fast I think you could see my pulse in my eyelids. I let him say his hellos to Henry, get sufficiently licked all over (from Henry again, not me), kiss me hello, and put his stuff down. Meanwhile I was still sitting there like a total dweeb, trying to act cool. So he comes to sit down next to me and immediately picked up on my doofus face, since I was grinning ear to ear. "Do you have something to tell me?" he asked. To which I replied, "Uh-huh, " still smiling too hard to form any intelligent sentences. Then he asked, "Was it positive?" and I said yes, then whipped out the hidden test from behind the pillow. He was well aware that I'd already taken two tests before this, and knew of my plan to test Tuesday morning. I explained that I simply couldn't wait until the next morning to test and began mumbling incoherent phrases together. I don't remember exactly what Nate said next but I'll never forget the look of happiness/shock/excitement on his face as we hugged each other. His bottom line: "This is so cool, I am into it." I think he said that about 5 times. We hugged and laughed and had a little moment for sure.

His first concerns? "Oh man, now I have to run this marathon by myself? Who will do my long runs with me?" Then, "Who will drink beers with me now?" and "Do I have to drink coffee all alone?" Funny, because we weren't exactly boozing partners in life, slamming down alcohol every night just because we were wild and free....and the coffee thing? I didn't think he'd mind losing his partner in crime for that one. The training buddy part makes sense, because it really does blow to run long distances alone. But after I soothed his fears about running, boozing, and drinking coffee alone he was able to embrace this idea of a baby even more fully. I'll also never forget this classic quote: "You know what is really great? Now we don't have to have those stupid conversations about when we'll start trying. That was really dumb, you know." Hee hee. I have to agree with him there:)

I've absolutely treasured seeing Nate's reaction to this whole thing. He is definitely dying to tell people, even more than me at this point, and I could get used to his gentle little pats on my tummy at the most random of times. His happiness and pride is obvious to me and I feel closer to him than ever before. Nothing like 'taking the next step' to make a marriage even stronger, right? He is going to be such a great dad, you guys.

From our parents:

We both knew we had to tell our parents early, since we'd definitely need their support if anything happened and we knew they'd be ecstatic with the news. This will be the first grandchild for both sides but I think both sets of parents assumed they'd have to wait a little longer to get their beloved grandchildren out of us.

Since Henry was the vessel for one major life event---our engagement, as Nate tied my ring around his neck during the proposal---I figured he should probably be the main character for this big event, too. I made him this shirt using an iron-on transfer sheet:

Before we left for our Missouri trip, we told Nate's parents. It was Tuesday night, July 14 and I was barely 5 weeks along. We put Henry's shirt on and carried him downstairs. Then Nate said to his mom, "Look at Henry's new muscle shirt, mom." She read it out loud while Henry wagged his tail which shook his whole body, making the text even more difficult to read. Her first reaction: "WHAT?? Who is pregnant???" Obviously a little confused:) Nate clarified that I was pregnant which made her scream and grab both of us for a big hug. Her favorite phrase was, "There is going to be a baby here!" which surprised us, since we weren't sure they'd be okay with a screaming newborn living above their bedroom.

Whether we'd stay or move was a huge question mark for Nate and I because we did not want to push the boundaries of our living situation and interfere with his parents' sleep. I kind of thought we might move out and rent a place for awhile, just to avoid any potential to damage our wonderful relationship with my in-laws. But seeing my mother-in-law's genuine reaction solidified the fact that we are still welcome in the duplex. When we relayed our concerns to her she said, "Why would you move? That is just silly. We've had babies in this house before and we can definitely do it again." Then, just to torture us, she threw in there, "Well maybe I'll just have to quit my job to stay home and play with the baby all day." Obviously, that won't actually happen but a girl can dream! I am so incredibly blessed to have them in our lives, you guys. And this means we can still add to our savings until Nate graduates, since daycare costs plus rent plus tuition and one salary would have definitely cut into the savings a lot.

Nate's dad came home shortly after we told his mom and surprisingly he got it right away! Hugs all around again and being the handy man he is, he immediately started rattling off all of the baby furniture they have stored in the attic. Of course they have baby furniture up there, right? I loved seeing how they looked at Nate after the news: proud, happy, and very knowing. They mentioned a few times how "Boy, your lives are going to change." I'm sure they are right:)

We told my parents when we came down for our Missouri visit and we waited until Friday morning, July 17, since we didn't get in until 1 am on Thursday. We were all sitting around the living room getting ready for breakfast when I said, "Oh, let me show you Henry's new shirt." I went and put it on him and had him run up the stairs to show it off. My mom read the first line of the shirt, stopped and stared at me and asked, "Are you pregnant?!?" and when I said yes she squealed and hugged me rather hard. She started yelling for my dad to read the shirt and my poor dad was so confused, he could hardly make out the words on the shirt. Once it sank in more hugs were had and I think my mom might have kissed Nate:) We spent the rest of the morning answering their questions and enjoying the moment.

My mom and I have had some fun conversations about pregnancy and babies, which is a new phase of our relationship that is pretty sweet. I mean, there is just something about bonding with my mom about becoming a mother to my own child that is priceless. Also, I learned that my mom did not get stretch marks and her labor time was always less than 2 hours. Whoo hoo! PLEASE let me have those genes.